Revenge of the Fallen gets universally bad reviews

by Paul William Tenny

Imagine a turd THIS BIG..
Michael Bay is going to be living the high life with all the money this Transformers sequel is going to make, but good grief the reviews coming in are brutal as hell. No point in looking up the Rotten Tomatoes or Meta Critic scores or making excuses for typically brainless Bay films, Revenge of the Fallen by all rights should be the year's biggest box office bomb.

It won't be, of course, but it should be.

Movies that feature a mother high on pot brownies and shows the family dogs screwing each other with mildly racist stereotypes attributed to giant robots that are -- even under the best of circumstances -- stupid and insulting, while misapplied appear demeaning and racist, better damned well be the best comedy of the year, if not the decade.

If it's an action movie aimed at kids, and I think you'd have to stretch reality pretty far to delude yourself into believing that this movie isn't aimed at teens, somebody has a hell of a lot of explaining to do. And no, I'm not talking about Michael Bay here.

Bay is huggable, mostly bankable, and doesn't really understand what he's doing or what's going on most of the time.

The "writers" (scare quotes included due to the questionable talent of Orci & Kurtzman who are rolling in money and success and yet are mostly responsible for this Gigli moment in their "careers") and Paramount/DreamWorks who are marketing this trash to kids on the other hand have a lot of nerve approving the unquestionably adult themes and language that don't belong in a PG-13 film. And from what these reviews are telling us, 90% of what's in this film doesn't belong in this film anyway because it was so badly written. So you've got problems with the content on multiple fronts that should have been ironed out before this thing even went into pre-production.

Yet this garbage is almost certainly going to make over half a billion dollars this year and we're going to have to suffer through at least one more of these intellectual black holes, if not several more.

in Film


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